Arthro-Pilates and Lupus





The Epidemic of Casualness

It’s been a few weeks now since I ventured into the murky waters of on-line dating and I am noticing a disturbing trend. “Casualness”. 

One would think that the internet with all its convenience has enabled people to connect more easily. But has it? Profiles with statements like “Looking for one special woman”, “Looking for a long term relationship”, and  “Looking to meet a soul-mate” can be misleading.  Men say they want these things, however when communication starts, it’s an endless stream of e mails and texting back and forth with no commitment to actually meeting. It's really simulated dating or as I call it simu-dating.

On-line seems to be a feeding ground for people who have all sorts of social phobias and are using their computer screen as a barrier to avoid actual real time interaction. I have met men who ask me repeatedly to phone them, and when I do they don’t know how to behave, are borderline rude, and make it apparent as to why they are not in a relationship in the first place. I’ve had one man send me up to 20 texts a day and when I suggested to him that we meet, he miraculously became incommunicado. Then there are the men who love to e mail and send pictures with promises of a face to face interaction that never materialize.

It’s all way to casual. I grew up in an era where people met in person, had things in common and a relationship ensued. I miss the good old days! These days it’s post a profile, misrepresent yourself and delete.  It’s an epidemic of casualness that is spreading more rapidly than the flu and is a means for people to connect without REALLY ever connecting. Modern technology is a wonderful thing and ideally is supposed to be bringing people closer together.  I am finding that the opposite is true.  But being a die hard optimist at heart, I have no intention of giving up. Wish me luck that indeed, there is someone out there who actually wants to meet “One special woman”,  because HERE I AM!


©Lori Weisbrod


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